Last night was possibly the worst night I have had in a very long time. It all started with a long work day, and a bunch of worthless customers. We had a grand total of five all day, and the only one who actually bought something came in at 4:25 (we close at 4:30) and didn't leave until well after five. From there I trekked back to my house to change out of my sweat soaked work attire (we don't have air conditioning and the building we occupy was once a refrigerated warehouse that still has six inches of foam insulation on most of the walls) and contact the people I was to be seeing that evening. My girlfriend, Alyssa had organized a few people to journey out to a little spot I had found with my friend, Graham, called the Tilted Kilt. The best way I have found to describe this place is "Hooters with kilts and green walls". This is a place you could easily see the Boondock Saints frequenting, but I digress. The first task of the evening was driving from my home in Brentwood, to my friend Anissa's in Antioch (about a twenty minute trip). Once we got there, Anissa informed Alyssa and I that before we went out that she needed to track down her boyfriend, Mike, whom she had promised to give a ride from a local bar to the downtown area to attend a friend's birthday party. This was a task within itself because nobody knew the location of the bar he was at, and he doesn't have a phone. After thirty minutes of driving up and down Murfreesboro pike without having any luck from Google Maps, Yelp, or the woman I had called who was working at the bar itself, we finally stumbled blindly into Larry's Restaurant and Lounge (I'm not kidding). Once coercing Mike into the car, he announced loudly that he wasn't going to Nashville, but was "Gonna go oyt wich'all". Also, about in the same time frame, Alyssa realized that she had also made plans with her friend Mary (thinking that her plans were for the next day) and resolved that we would bring her along with us, which meant we had to pick her up from Nolensville (another twenty minute drive from where we were). There is one thing I forgot to mention about most of Alyssa's friends, if they don't know where something is, they refuse to drive there. It's kind of like watching a three year old sit down in the middle of the cereal aisle, cross her arms and demand to be carried. Also, I don't care for Mary too much, but I'll get into that in a minute. At this point, Anissa had become so stressed out, she decided to scrub the whole mission and stayed with Mike at her apartment, leaving Alyssa and I alone with Mary.
On the drive to get Mary, I start to notice that Alyssa is staring at me. She will stare at me for long tracks of time without saying anything, as if she is trying to read my blank facial expressions. She does it mainly when she thinks I'm agitated, but she also does it when I'm doing mundane tasks like washing dishes, or even worse when I'm working out. It really bugs me when people stare at me, and people stare at me a lot because of my facial piercings, long hair, and large frame. But random strangers I can yell at or embarrass by staring back. With Alyssa I can do nothing but make an awkward situation out of something very small, or silently fume. Me being who I am went with the latter. I kept trying to tell myself that cheap beer and good music were not far away. Oh was I wrong.
Once Mary had been collected we started down the path, and so did Mary's mouth. Alyssa and Mary talk about the stupidest topics one could think of, it's actually quite painful to listen to. This pain was only made more vibrant because of a traffic jam that slowed our pace for an already lengthy trip (about forty five minutes) to a scratching crawl. And to add salt to my growing torment, they started talking about pregnancy. A previous girlfriend and I, a few years back, had lost a child in the late stages of the third trimester, so the subject of kids is a touchy one to me. I can't even be around children for more than an hour before needing a drink or a hasty escape. So being trapped in a small space with two people who were fully aware of this fact, discussing it was torture. After starting this little adventure around 5:30, at approximately 10:00 we finally reached the pub. And to my stomach's joy the grill was still open. Even though I had personally gave them the run down of how this establishment did it's business (Hooters with kilts) they both still shot me the "Are you kidding me?" feminazi glances. After wrestling with finding our server and trying to hear my guests grumble a conversation I wasn't invited into, I got my hamburger and my beer and I was content. Until of course our waitress decided to pop a squat at our table. At first I thought she was dumb, and boy was I wrong. She had originally lost favor with our table by not acknowledging us at first and being a bit daft about the menu. I didn't recognize her sitting with us as a ploy for a better tip at first, but it became blatantly obvious as I listened to her talk to Mary and Alyssa (I again wasn't invited into the conversation). Before three minutes had passed, she dropped on the girls that she had a five month old baby at home, but was getting a tumor removed. She didn't know if it was malignant. Surprised? I could see her stock portfolio rising rapidly. But I had to give it to her, my companions aren't easily hoodwinked, Alyssa particularly. This didn't stop for some time, so again I was subject to hearing about all the joys of children I was robbed of. Once again perpetuated by people that knew extensively of my past. I had to excuse myself outside because I was afraid I might lose my cool. After about fifteen minutes of talking on the phone I came back inside, I paid my tab and we left. Mark my words, I will never go out with the two of them again, under no circumstance or reason. Have a good day.